Friday, December 30, 2016


I have been in deep thoughts about marriage for a few weeks now and it became obvious to me that one of the greatest challenge in being married is the expectations we have of our spouse wrong or right. When this expectations are not met, we become disappointed and then we start acting up.. Today I want to ask a few questions to those that are married. It will help you if you are not married too.. 
  1. What are or was your expectations about marriage ?
  2.  Did the person you marry fit into your true idea of who you wanted as a wife or a husband.
  3. Can you live with yourself truly as man or wife.. This will help you take the blame off your spouse and see yourself.. can I live with the woman/man I am? Can i live with my standards and expectations? 
  4. How have I contributed to the progress or stagnation of my marriage? 
  5. What can I do to enjoy my marriage and make it better ?
 Let's know that we can not clap with one hand. You need both hands to clap.. so are you trying to clap alone in your marriage? Marriage God's way is two people working together as a team.. We lose or win together as a couple. My take on marriage is shared in Amos 3:3. Love in marriage is beautiful but love as written in 1 corinthians 13 is more than a feeling. Beyond love we need to work/walk in agreement in all we do as couples. This include working together on our finance, romance, parenting, spirituality and how we do life together generally. I find this quote below interesting and a life saver for marriage.
If we must take our marriage to the next level, we must take this quote to heart.. "The only man I know who behaves sensibly is my tailor; he takes my measurements anew each time he sees me. The rest go on with their old measurements and expect me to fit them" . George Bernard Shaw.
Lets know from this quote above if the man or woman you married changed in many ways, are you judging them with the knowledge you had at the beginning of your marriage? Are you using an outdated syllabus on your spouse? It's time to upgrade dear husband and wife... its time to study yourself and your spouse daily. It's time to be sensible in every way and measure your spouse in a new way.. marriage can be beautiful if you go about it God's way and ensure you do your best with your spouse to make it beautiful in your own way. Know that you will have challenges along the way but if you believe in my analogy of you and your spouse being the tongue and teeth, then when conflict comes, you can still move on and make progress. Marriage is beautiful.. Make yours more of pleasure than of pain this coming year 2017.

2017 is a new year to pay attention to your marriage, make your marriage top priority this new year coming and watch your life change for the better.
I will be glad to help you and your spouse if you both need help in understanding yourselves and how to make your marriage a priority and team centered . 
You can send a mail to or add me on Twitter @BridgetElesin. Let's chat and see how I can help you and your spouse with the knowledge I have about marriage and share what has worked for my husband and I for over 13 years now.
I pray for someone reading this post; may God help you not to give up on yourself or your spouse. May God help you to see beauty in each other and give yourselves another opportunity to love yourselves again through God's eyes in Jesus name amen. @BridgetElesin

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