Saturday, January 31, 2009

WHAT WOMEN EXPECT FROM THEIR HUSBANDS!


We thank God for a new month!, January flew past in a hurry! She smiles. Its great to see another month, which most people have come to associate with Love as February 14, is a day set aside for lovers worldwide to celebrate Valentine's day, a day where they show their love by sending cards, flowers, chocolates and other gifts to their loved ones.
As its another Valentine month, what better way to help all my sisters that are wifeys except by giving all the hints and tips that will make their husbands treat them specially this month! All male Visitors to this blog that are husbands, should take the hint and over perform to bring that well deserved smile to their wives faces...i await testimonies o!

I decided to post this in response to one of my commentator's comment and some of my non commentators that have told me, they can not wait to see what the women expect, so here we are!

1. A woman wants the three Ls - That is Love, which is the most important, because without love in a relationship, then the relationship is doomed, especially in a marriage relationship, where we are not suppose to take the route of divorce, (following God's words in the bible).For me, true love is 1 Corinthians 13, Please kindly go and read it and meditate on it, to avoid me writting a long post! lol

Listening - This is major part of Communication and for a woman this is key as this is a major love need of every woman, knowing, she can talk to her husband and he will listen to her needs, and try to meet it.
Its said that women talk more than men, so apart from talking, its knowing that the men are listening, because you can be talking and the person is quiet and not listening! She laughs!

My husband started this listening aspect of our married life a couple of years ago, I do not know where he got the idea from but whoever taught him or told him that...God bless you! She laughs..because this has truly helped us. So every day, he comes back from work, he will ask me how my day was and truly listen to me, sometimes i pity him as i am a fast talker and can start three different story at the same time! lol!, sometimes when he gets lost in the different stories, he begs me to go over and start the stories or my tales again! Very funny..but it has worked everytime. He is my sounding board and i can throw every idea i have to him, knowing he will listen and finally help me come up with solutions or give advice that will help me as i pour out my tales, stories, frustrations, heartaches out. If you have never done this, try it, this month of February and see the difference..if you are the impatient one, then you must pray for patience to listen and finally long suffering, if need be! She laughs!

Laughter! This is important as laughter is indeed medicine to the heart and soul! Its good to be able to laugh at each other and laugh about everything...In my home, not laughing a day is a crime! No matter how challenging our day gets, we always come home and have something to laugh about, it could be what we saw or heard that day that will provide the comic relief or our children, with their talks/play but if there is nothing, then the Television will provide that laughter avenue...it could be watching Fuji house of Commotion, American Idols, George Lopez, Hannah Montana or any of the disney channel series, laugh we must...i truly recommend it, if not for anything but for the truth that God laughs too! Psalm 2-4a, am sure there are other verses like that in the bible, but this readily comes to mind as its a favorite scripture for prayer...This is an indication of my kind of prayers o! lol

2. A woman wants a Friend, all the above are steps to lead to true friendship in marriage but apart from this, a woman wants a friend, she can be herself with , no matter what, someone, she can tell anything, no matter how silly, knowing the person has got her back, who better than her husband to be her friend!

3.A woman wants her spiritual, physical, emotional and financial needs met by her husband..knowing her husband is ready to care for her in all areas is a delight to any wife... her husband is her first priest and pastor, someone she prays with daily and receives revelation from, if as a wife, your husband is not a born again Christian, you can help by praying for him and also help by leaving Christian books and inspirational books in the toilet, so that he can read as he goes in for the business that goes on in that area!, He will download revelations that will help you later, also tapes being played helps..all this are not for the unbelieving husbands alone but for all!

Physical needs are the romantic part,love making, kisses, hugs,, this varies for some people but this is my own physical need defination!Lol

Emotional needs, this is vital as a woman's emotional state is different from a man's own, and women are more emotional as they relate to situations from their heart!, so the husband has to see to it that his wife's emotional bank is filled.. with the 3 Ls in place and all other factors following, this will be met hopefully! She laughs...We are simple and complex! lol!

Financial needs - This is being able to cater for the family needs in terms of money spent and saved as every woman wants to see that the family is financially secured too incase of a challenge! For most godly women, who earns more is not a problem as they know "them" and their money, belongs to their head, who is the husband and will direct them aright. So even if this is the case, which is not usually the ideal one, the man still contributes to the upkeep of the house in his own way as well as treat his wife to the occasional gifts..take a hint o!

4.Women want to be admired, be praised by their husband, A woman wants her husband to notice if she is wearing a new hair style, new clothes, accessories etc.. and when this is not done, its a big blow...even if the hair is not fine...still say, something nice and tell her you would have prefered your favorite style she wears or something that was truly nice on her...she will take the hint and do a new one, or you can be very gracious to pay for the hair the second time! Another hint o!

A woman also feels good, when her husband compliments her cooking, neatness of the house, the children's look or those little things she has been doing to add value to your life as a husband...so i do not think, it will cost you anything to say " You are doing a great job with so and so...., the truth is if you make an habit of not being thankful and saying it...a time will come, when she will start feeling, she is being taken for granted! Boy..this is for real!

5.A woman wants a secured Husband...one that knows his position is number one in her life, and everything apart from God, a supportive man that will let her grow wings that will let her fly careerwise, ministry wise, a foundation to her dreams etc. Many women and men will truly fulfill destiny if both parties are secured in their love for each other!

6.A woman expects help with the house,children and other things around the house...gone are the days of "you Jane and me Tarzan"!She laughs! Now its a partnership, the man helps with household chores and other things around the house..it truly helps the woman and the man as well, because the man by doing those jobs considered feminine is telling the wife..i love you, care for you and we are in this together as i do not want to see you stressed and worn out! this helps her psychologically and she reciprocates by truly serving him as her master!

7. A woman wants a man that can protect her! This protection can be from Inlaws/Inloves as i call them, outsiders etc.. as you value her, showing respect to her, people around too will do same and give you all your space, protection is also physical, as you are her VOLTRON!the defender of your household! lol! This time its not the universe o! She laughs!

8.A woman wants a man that will give her time to breathe, its not only men that look for escape routes or want to go out with the boys,lol! women too desire to do their thing with their friends or just take time out to have time for themselves! I do this from time to time, and when i am having my "me" time, my husband helps with the children,so i come out from the room, after a nap, prayer time or rest, refreshed,renewed and ready to be a wife and a mummy again!

What we expect are many...but the eight loaded points covers almost all, the bottom line is to really ask your wife what you will do to take your marriage to the next level and as you do, listen to her and put actions to what she says...Things indeed will start happening...I wont be surprised to hear of new births as a result of this post! she laughs! Am done!...but i crave spiritual ones...Official God mother to the ones that will show forth as a result of reading and putting to practice things learnt here! Enjoy your love month and throw in an outing too! We love that...dinners, cinemas,park walks, buka eating,etc and the occasional gifts too!

2 comments:

Amen said...

There are alot of things women want as clearly stated. I think women appreciate it more, if the things are done not as a "to do list " but if the husband does it totally out of love and the simple fact that he wants to make her happy.

Dipo Tepede said...

@ Amen.

I believe you just complicated it again;

You want spontaneity but men are very logical and a "to do list' though not written may help him remember all this things at the initial stage.

To try to change a man to be a woman and still expect the man to be a man will not work out.

What you need to promote is a compromise of ego for both male and female to reach a common ground.

Great work, Bridget!

These are great pointers for men...

Dipo Tepede
www.dipotepede.com